Smoke THIS!

I live just outside of a relatively small college town, out in the country, in a 4-plex apartment.
Nothing really to brag about, let me tell ya. However, it is quiet, there's a nice view of the moon and stars at night, and no one hardly ever bothers you. The keyword in the previous sentence being hardly.

We live in one of the basement apartments. This is not something I would recommend, as we've had two tennents above us who've been very heavy footed assholes. You know the type, too lazy to get up and say something neighborly, if they have some sort of problem they'd rather bang on the walls or stomp on the floor than get off their ass and say something. And, god forbid, if they do get off their ass, they come at you like they are so entitled to come up and be dicks instead of just saying what they've got to say. You learn a lot about the people who live around you, especially if you live right below them, and sometimes, people, it is truly scary.

Yesterday evening, Honey had burned some papers that he prefers not to throw in the garbage. We have a small "fire pit" next to our apartment, on the side of the building. There are no windows on this side of the building, except for ours. This pit used to be our grill, but we've upgraded since then. Anyhoo, I digress...

He burnt the papers, and we prepared to eat dinner. Granted, the papers stank! I even pushed the door to so we didn't have to smell it while we ate. But, I knew it wouldn't last long, there weren't that many papers.

About two bites into dinner, someone is banging on our door. Three times she banged before I could walk all of four feet to the door. I opened the door, and this woman (?), whom I've never seen before in my life, stood before me, in a huff, and began to yell,

"Could you DO something about THAT? My mother and I are CHOKING TO DEATH upstairs!"

I just looked at her.

Then, I looked at Honey.

Mind you, I know who she is, even though I've never seen her. She is the daughter of the lady who rents the apartment upstairs. I know this because she looks just like her. Together, these two could anchor a ship, if they'd be willing to walk the distance, but mother won't even walk to the mailbox. Daughter has shown up out of nowhere, and paying rent? HA! I highly doubt it. I've spoken with the mother before, she's told me stories of one of her daughters she had to get away from. Somehow, I suspect, this is the one. I'd also be willing to bet they were both upstairs chain-smoking, all the while bitching about the smoke.

I guess she got scared when I looked over at Honey, cause she didn't have anything else to say. Apparently, she's afraid of Black men, cause when he looked at her, she decided to turn around and walk away, with her bitch-ass attitude.

I just stood there stunned. How does someone approach someone like that they have never met? How do you just knock on someone's door and start yelling?! I mean, for all she knew, I could be a black-belt and (had I been) coulda opened that door and karate-chopped her fatass! The thought sure crossed my mind...